A few years ago, a medical study showed that people who live within walking distance of a fast food restaurant have a 40% higher risk of developing heart disease and/or having a stroke.
I’m screwed. Big time.
We live within walking distance of 42 of them. Well, that’s 42 restaurants. Not all of them are fast food joints. Some are…others are family dining or more upscale establishments. Four are buffets–five if I’m allowed to include Golden Corral, which isn’t really within walking distance–but very close.
Anyone who knows me knows I can’t cook. The only thing I do with any level of expertise in the kitchen is set it on fire. I do takeout. I’m great at takeout. And nuking food. Without a microwave and a can opener, I’d starve.
It’s a good thing Collin works in a restaurant.
It’s a good thing he brings dinner home most nights. Or is it?
(There’s one thing I don’t understand about the growing fast food options, however. Is there really such a high demand for spicy food? Jack in the Box, for example, recently introduced the Hot Mess burger. I didn’t try one, even when a buy-one-get-one-free offer showed up in my text messages. Nor have I tried their newest offering, the Jalapeno Ranch Ultimate Cheeseburger. Years of living with acid reflux has taught me to steer clear of such things. McDonald’s also has a couple of hot/spicy sandwiches on their menu, like the Buffalo Ranch McChicken and the Bacon Habanero Ranch Quarter Pounder. Last Saturday, Collin brought home some takeout from Taco Bell–including a new item, the quesarito. Had I known it had chipotle sauce in it, I would have avoided it like a vampire faced with a basket full of garlic.)
Today is my birthday. Collin signed both of us up for every rewards club for every participating restaurant within a ten-mile radius, so my email box is currently loaded with emails for free birthday meals, most of which will have to be used within the next two weeks. That’s not going to be easy.